my christmas was kinda okay... i mean it was actually better than what i had in mind... i thought i was gonna spend it sulking and shit but fortunately i didn't... well not the whole time... morning of the 24th i helped out my mom with dinner and shit... then felt down so i went out to take a walk... looked back at all the good things that have happened and at the bad things... weird how one bad thing can swallow so many good things... DAMN! anyway i was about to start my prep routine for our family dinner thing when Wicket came along... thanks... basically he made my day... Wicket is so sweet... anyway he's a maltese... then my family and i went to my lola's house (mom's side) for dinner and all... got to hang out with my cousins and shit... click HERE to check out the pics...  then we went home... wanted to go out to just chill with friends but i was too darn tired... got a thong from my cousin... hehehehe... a wallet from my lola... and cash from my ninang... then the next day i had to walk Wicket... exercise... then i gave him a sponge bath... he's 5 months old so he cant take a shower everyday... then my brothers and i went to my dad's... got cash, cordless phone (thanks ATE!)... oh yeah thanks to those who gave me something this xmas... diane, alex, alex's sister ria, my family, jay... then i went home to rest... went out again after an hour to get wicket some things (toys)... then went back... didnt get to stay home long (oh lemme see 2 minutes?) coz we left for my tita's house (mom's side)... one of those traditions... holy fuck we had so much fun there... taking pictures and just basically fucking around acting like kids and shit... then we wet home... so that was my xmas... dec 26 i just basically bummed around... and today too... not at home though i've had too much of this home shit to last me a lifetime... hehehe... so that's basically it... thanks for those who greeted me!... merry xmas... can't wait til new year... we have fun traditions here at our village...

it's 730 pm... 24th of december... everyone here is preparing... they have been since this mornng... well i was helping earlier.. somehow half way through it all i got lazy... stopped and let my mom finish up... that was around 2 in the afternoon... then i spent at least an hour on the net doing nothing... then i stayed in my room til 6pm... was greeted by some people... (mark, diane, ali and the rest... thanks by the way)... then i went out to take a walk... a very long walk... ended up at my cousin's house then went home... turned on the cd player poured myself some red wine and chilled... i started thinking... which is bad... i can get really emotional...

realized that for the first time in a really really long time i dont feel as lonely... i mean it's still lonely but not that lonely... i guess i have YOU to thank... xmas has been really cold and empty for me lately but somehow YOU have managed to put a little warmth in it... hope next xmas won't be so cold anymore... missing YOU...

so far it's been weird... woke up shit early... (which is okay)... ran some errands for my mom and all that... (which is also okay)... cooked some things... my mom's at my aunt's house right now and she just called my cell (coz she couldn't call the landline... coz i'm on the net...)... she told me to wake up my, now, STUPID ASS BROTHER!!!!!... the little fucker woke up and started yelling.. he's like BAKIT? ANO NA NAMAN?... so i told him to go to my aunt's house coz mom wanted him to... he's all like are you on the internet? coz i wanna call her and shit... i'm all ei just go there... she said hurry... he was walking around for sometime and then said TIGNAN MO YUNG SUSI NASA KWARTO (locked in my mom's room)... the little shit was yelling at me!... it was so annoying... he's so stupid.. he must've felt pretty stupid too coz i said IT'S ON THE TABLE!!! what a shit... he just ruined my xmas eve... i mean fuck i don't even mind the hassle of it all and shit but yeah... an irritating son of a bitch would do it for me... i'll pos pics later... i've been taking pics (but what else is new)

i've been singing this song for the last five minutes... and it's five thirty in the fucking morning... i'll just give you an idea of what the song is about... hehehe... i'm so NOT laughing! i'm smiling though...

Don't Mess with My Man

It was hard to find a brotha that was down for me
So I'm tellin everybody let him be
Cause he's mine and I can't take no pigeons tryna take my baby
So I thought I had to let you know find someone you can call your own...
If you mess with my man, Ima be the one to break it to yah
Got my girls, got my man so find your own and leave mine alone
Don't mess with my man, Ima be the one to break it to you
Here's a lil advice for you, find your own man
Blah blah blah...
Cause the tryna take my baby oh what the hell NO!
So now you really better check yourself
Messing with my man is bad for your health
do whatever you want but don't fooh with my booh

holy fuck... so yeah... i've been singing that song for the longest time... i guess coz it's so darn nice... NOT!

Something to See: ... start again fulfill a dream... read that somewhere we would find paradise... if you'd only try with me see that we... should be trying to find a cause...  for our own flaws... know that just to be with you in a love that's truly free.. that could be you and me... it'd be something to see coz you know we're too far gone... to ever be the same way we've been so long... something to see we can make it if we hold on... the way it should be... with love leading us along... love's so beautiful to me now's the chance for all to see... ALL YOU NEED IS TO BELIEVE, LOVE'S THE KEY... a peace between us, you and me, then a crystal city's where we could be ... then there'd be no mystery just free to be... know that just to be with you and IN LOVE WAS ALL IT WAS IT SHOULD NEVER BE BECAUSE...

i just realized how great my friends are... they are amazing... and the best part is they'll never leave you... no matter what... the sad part of it all is i have during times when i needed to be alone thinking that they can't possibly help me (there are 13 of us in the barkada --> 13 guys and 2 girls... it's growing but most "add-ins" are guys too)... last saturday they proved me wrong... they were there telling me that they'll always be there whatever shit happens... and i love you guys for that... and i'm sorry i didn't have much faith in you people before... all you asses ever do kasi is drink and rag on people (esp dianne and me!)... i'm glad you guys are my friends... when things get shitty and people start walking out of my life :( i know i won't be alone...

things have definitely changed... i can actually feel him giving up... so basically i'm... yeah...

people like to talk a lot of shit... you know who you are... just because you're miserable it doesn't mean you gotta bring everyone down with you... whatever shit it is you're going through it has nothing to do with us so shut up... i'm quiet and i may seem like i don't give a fuck sometimes but yeah when you step on people i love and people i care about it's a whole different story... i'm doing fine now so deal with your shit in another way...

i'm still a little angel though... just a really irritated angel...

what a way to start xmas break... last thursday was the reunion thingy with UP friends at Bravo Malate... then dinner friday night at san fran steakhouse (you guys have to go there! it's amazing) and just chilling with some friends... met some really fun people... then last night... diane's birthdya party slash our barkada's xmas shit...

left the house at around 830pm... got there at around 1045pm... and we took the SKYWAY!!! my god diane you're one of my closest friends but shit i'm never going back there again... that's like the freaking province already... tagaytay is closer! even laguna! poch was already there... talking to some people... and diane's high school friends... so basically it was jc, daryll, diane, tom, todd, poch, alex and meeh! amazing how most of the ones who came are FROM THE FUCKING SOUTH and most of the people from THE GHETTO NORTH did not show up! you're on her list... you guys know that right? hehehe!

Got this off of Valerie's Blog

R - You are a social butterfly.
I - You are always smiling & making others smile.
C - You definitely have a partier side in you, don't be shy to show it.
A - You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.

great party last night alex... send me the pics... didn't have my cam with me so GOOD JOB RICA!